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740 - August The Great and Powerful

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August was a bitch. No ifs or buts about it. Very long, very tedious and very exhausting.

While there are a myriad of topics to cover for this Month Review, I'm taking a different approach this time around folks. Because I have something to get off my chest and more importantly, out of my life for good.

I want to devote segment to put to bed an issue as of this MR I will hopefully going to never acknowledge again. Because frankly, I'm done humoring these people and now treating them in the same regard as trolls, Jehovah's witnesses and members of my extensive family. By not giving them the attention they haven't earned and do not diverse anymore.

I mean sure I'll still comment on stupid decisions (mostly by Marvel) but they'll be aimed at the source rather than the symptoms.

Consider this one final FUCK YOU aimed at the blithering idiots we call Social Justice Warriors, who have turned the far left politics of Liberals into a complete and utter laughing stock. Now say what you will about right wing conservatives (Hell my comments clock in at over 100,000,000,000 words uttered in their direction) but they're not as delusional as the safe space gender police, demanding every and all video games be censored, movies need to star anyone who isn't white and on a personal crusade to undo everything 1st wave feminists and the late Martin Luther King fought for by sending us all back to the 1930's.

For your continued a front to justice and those actually fighting for a progressive future. I speak for only myself when I state the following.

Fuck you. Fuck you and everything you attack helicopter cucklings stand for.

You're the reason we cannot have reasonable discussion or stand up comedians can't make a joke without you obese landwhales screaming "I'M OFFEEEEENDEEEEEEEEDD!!!!" while Steve Shives builds a bigger wall around himself than even Donald Trump can blow smoke about. The reason Beyonce, a rich black woman who never has to work an honest days work in her life, has the cast iron balls to proclaim she's a feminist and being "held down!" I nearly collapsed harder than Hillary Clinton trying to climb a flight of stairs in laughter when I heard that.

So, why's the sudden change of heart you ask? Because it took me awhile to realize this, but these people are not worth the effort. I read a blog post that gave me some new perspective in life.

www.returnofkings.com/87273/14…

Entry #4 being the biggest eye opener for me. I basically don't want to spend my days "proving wrong" people that have been proven wrong more times than a creationist that it isn't even funny anymore. I mean how many times do they need to be proven wrong about the pay gap? How many times do they need to be proven wrong about non existent sexism in video games? How many times do they need to be proven wrong about police brutality? And how many times do they need to proven wrong about ANYTHING they scream about?

Much like jokes about Mega Man being cancelled or 4Kids, there comes a time when you just decide to put Old Yeller down and get on with what's left of your life. So permit me to throw a little something out there. A headline from Turkey also served as a catalyst on my departure from decapitating SJW shitheads.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europ…

This kind of brutality is unacceptable and barbaric. The kind of thing progressives would naturally be addressing and calling for change right?

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXR91U…

The article in question was posted on the 21st of August 2016. I decided to conduct a little experiment. I went over the usual suspects Twitter feeds (From Brianna Wu to the Young Turks) to see what our Social Justice League were talking about on that day. To see if they were as outraged as I, someone who isn't and never will be an SJW.

And you'll never guess what?

Radio fucking silence!

Yet you know what alot of these idiots had the time for? Whining about Harambe Memes, Donald Trump or laughing at white people over the casting of a black woman to play a fictional character who is white.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZxzJG…

That brings me to what I call "The Mary Jane Blackson Bullshit!"

Now for the record, I do not know who Zendeya is and frankly I couldn't give a ratass, yet I take more issue with the defense than the offense on this occasion. Where I find myself on this issue is that it COULD be good, all depending on Zendeya's acting ability. If she's terrible then cast her into the fires of mount doom where she belongs. Considering she's a Disney actress I won't hold any hope on her being good, yet until I see an actual conformation that "yes she is indeed Mary Jane Watson" I ain't buying a word of it. Considering they're still playing the "Michelle" card on most media I frequent. Now to the dipshits (yes that includes you James Gunn) shouting down at their audience for voicing an opinion on this decision, may I advise you choose your words very fucking carefully.

Because nobody wants a repeat of this.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3ugHP…

Yeah Marvel, do us all a favor and keep Sony a trillion miles away from the marketing of this movie. The last thing we need is Spider-Man Homecoming shoehorning reshoots of Mary Jane reading YouTube comments, Spider-Man webshooting Vulture in the balls or Zendeya's nudes being put online and her website hacked.

I don't personally think she should be Mary Jane Watson, not because she's black but because I feel reusing iconic characters this much is making it stale. It's why I'm all over the idea of Vulture and the Tinkerer (with rumors of Shocker) being Spidey's first major foes for the MCU. Sadly that makes me a borderline racist with privilege according to Spider-Man writer and professional whiner Dan Slott.

What simply fails to grasp Slotty boys sausage fingers is the concept of established characters. If an ethnicity is no big issue for this ugly little cuckling, then I demand Storm to be played by a white chick. I mean who cares about preexisting continuity and source materiel? Fuck that noise, oh and while we're at it, I couldn't forget the full on pissing and moaning you mouth breathing hypocrites had when Doctor Strange saw The Ancient One, traditionally a Tibetan monk, announced to be played by a white chick.

Oh please, tell me how you weren't outraged by that? After all "It's just an ethnicity right?"

I mean there's nothing that says Luke Cage, Rhodie, John Stewart, Robbie Robertson HAVE TO BE BLACK. Oh wait, if anyone tried to do that, you'd drop the cheese burger and tell us all "DAT WACIST!!" like the typical New York bullshit artist you are! Case in point; Scarlet Johannson playing the Major in Ghost in the Shell. No seriously asshole, tell me to "get over it!"

I guess "Captain White Privilege" is your secret identity who has the weakness of "commonsensetonyte!"

I may not be a minority myself, but the constant ethnic washing of established characters would make me reach for the nearest baseball bat in rage. Taking characters like Thor, Captain America, Wolverine, Spider-Man, Captain Marvel, Iron Man and now Mary Jane Watson apparently and making them everything but a white person who wants to share a bed with a member of the opposite sex is getting beyond retarded. More to the point it's not unique or creative!

I mean why in holy goat fucking would you want to inspire a new generation of readers and fans with their own heroes and stars, when you can give them hand me downs from whitey's toy chest? Like I said I'm not a minority but if I was I'd be feeling pretty insulted by this shit. I'd say something along the lines of "I don't want a black Spider-Man, I want my OWN HERO!!"

And unlike the slack jawed yokels over at Marvel Comics, that's exactly what I've done. I've made it a personal mission to create a long list of my own characters with an outline to capture nearly every walk of life from most countries of the world. From Canada all the way down under to Australia. I have shown far more creativity, originality and mental thought that the pinheads at Marvel who consider THIS an idea pitch.

Guy: Duuuuuh, what if we gave Thor tits?

What also brings my highly caffeinated piss to a boil is MovieBob impersonators such as Moby Dick's half retarded cousin over here, it's that he is sucking down on the SJW koolaid for far too long much like the entire Marvel writing staff. Desperately pandering to trending topics in a laughable bid for relevance. Yet much like Iron Man being a black Mary Sue and "Hail Hydra" it quickly blew up in their faces and made them rethink their liberal bullshit.

Oh and btw Marvel? Next time, Google search shit to make sure you don't accidentally name a progressive character after a porn star.
fusion.net/story/339804/riri-w…

Coming soon to WinneBobble. My brand new characters of Nikki Benz, Siri Suxxx and Ron Jeremy.

So no, Mary Jane doesn't have to black. Because it is lazy and shows a lack of real diversity. By giving a minority a preexisting white character, you're showing your inability to create something.

Here watch this.

Jasmine Carter.
Aged 19.
Studied at NYU.
Happened to meet Peter Parker and the two share a common interest in science and tinkering.

See? That took me roughly 20 seconds. Not that I'm trying to toot my own horn but if I can can create you a brand new black character in 20 seconds, you wanna see what I could do in an evening? Also out of sheer coincidence I did a quick google search on the name Jasmine Carter (you know so I don't repeat your mistake with Iron Heart) and the first couple of images were off an African American Girl.

I must be psychic XD

I mean why not create a black girlfriend for Spider-Man? I mean giving him a girlfriend with dwarfism in the comics went over very well so why not go the extra mile? Stop repainting existing characters to suit a political agenda you imbeciles? You know why people didn't give DC Comics shit for casting Will Smith as Deadshot? Because unlike you, DC isn't beating everyone over the head with their liberal white guilt while screaming "LOOK HOW PROGRESSIVE I AM!!" while failing to realize your comics end up on the bottom of the top 100 list each month!

And on a personal note to Dan Slott.

Superior Spider-Man? It's kinda shit! Then again what do you expect from a guy who spends 24 hours pissing and moaning about Man of Steel. A movie a thousand times better than anything this chode has ever written in his life.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZHvd0…

But that's Social Justice Losers for you. They preach a regressive message as a means to ignore the actual problems in life. They want everyone to be equal... But are enforcing segregation. They want everyone to be treated fairly... But are forcing school kids to learn about imaginary "white privilege!" They feel everyone should be heard in a debate... But constantly ban conservatives from social media. They believe freedom is a right we all must have... But love "one particular religion" that is demanding to have every one of your freedoms taken away. May I just state to the P.C. Police that you're constant need to say everything is racist, sexist, misogynistic, Islamophobic etc. I would like you to stop using those words to describe everything you encounter please.

I'm not saying don't use them all together, but rather not everything is what you claim it to be. Because you're devaluing those words and making them meaningless, to the point when actual accounts of racism and so forth appear. They'll get a free pass because you're so busy being "offended" by a cartoon or some outfit in a video game.

They are thankfully the minority, a laughing stock and a fucking embarrassment to what ever remains of the Western World. You do not speak for anyone but yourselves and when you have The Young Turks as your mouth piece. Make like Zippy and fucking zip it!

And with that mic fucking dropped. I am officially done with Social Justice Warriors. Never again will I waste an entire rant, a segment and the 44mag caliber words to describe their imaginary illnesses and made up oppression in there desperate attempts to remain relevant in a world that's finally waking up to their bullshit. As Shredder said to Baxter Stockman as he tossed him into a dimensional portal.

"Good riddance to bad rubbish!"



Which leaves us with the other thing I wanted to devote time onto for the MR. Every gamers personal nemesis that isn't an elected official... IGN.

While I have been making a poor effort to ignore everything IGN does, I did sadly gave these bullshit merchants the time of day with their clickbait feelings regarding Sonic the Hedgehog. Whatever your personal feelings towards the Hedgehog maybe, I regard him as one of the essential ingredients of gaming that helped paved the way for the endless borefest gamers are subjected to every year.

No Mario and Sonic? No Call of Duty. Simple as that.

Unlike the dickless dude bros over at Screwattack, I can at least respect IGNorance for coming right out with it and admitting their biased feelings towards this franchise. That's where the respect ends for there comments do cause me (and alot of others) to speculate on a few things. If they're saying "Sonic was never good to begin with" then how do you explain their strangely positive review scores over the years?

Clearly you could argue that this represents corruption in gaming journalism (not that I needed a movement to point that out) because as someone who has been with the series since day 1, I'm not sure what these paste swilling dildos are on about. Mind you, why would you trust anything from people who have appeared in a FeministFrequnency video?

While it's easy to rail on IGN for their subjective playground opinions, or the fact they no doubt take a Sony and Activision creampie in the ass every night. The point remains Sonic the Hedgehog has become an easy target for these "professional reviewers" that even when he is on top form (Sonic Colors) they'll still burn him an effigy over shit that is no longer relevant (Sonic 06) or something that wasn't Sonic Team's fault (Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric)

Because which do you think we'll give IGN more clicks? Telling us that Assassin's Creed, Mass Effect and Call of Duty have been sucking harder than Gianna Michaels in a POV video? Or beating a dead horse and tell us "SANIK SUX GUYZ!" Because with the announcement of Sonic Mania, a game that devoted 100% of it's trailer to actual gameplay footage, no prerenderded cutscenes and basically avoided everything that is wrong with modern gaming trailers. How could you find something to complain about?

Oh wait, it's IGN. Silly me.

Let me spin this scenario in another way. Imagine you have a friend you've known since high school. You've been with her through the ups and downs, then she became addicted to substance abuse and drinking that she lost her way. She became victim of insults and accusations that it drove her to depression. Yet she finally admits she has a problem and got the professional help she needed. She goes to rehab and reemerges as the person you became friends with all those years ago. As she leaves the treatment center, you and her other friends are there to greet her and offer congratulations.

Yet as you all cheer, some sneering douchebag and his friends loudly mock her and say "she's still a terrible person and you all should call the cops!" reducing your poor friend to tears after trying so hard to fix her problems.

That sneering douchebag is IGN to me. A cavernous cockend of the highest order. Will tell you every game under the yellow sun is terrible... Unless it's Call of Duty or Mass Effect.

Bioware: Where do you want it?
IGN: In my ass, senpai!

Sonic Mania is a bold attempt to fix the problem and destroy the Sonic Cycle, yet like the late Michael Jackson himself, the press only want to print the same old stories. I find it very telling how they'll continue to beat the "Sanic sux" angle yet turn a blind eye to Call of Duty's declining sales numbers and even engaged in career suicide by telling people they're "wrong" about the Mass Effect 3 ending.

Sure Sonic kissed a human Princess, gave Shadow a questionable game and turned into a werehog, but at least he never tried to tell gamers Mass Effect 3 was great and they're wrong to hate it. Mind you having an IGN staff member added to Mass Effect 3 shows no bias there.

*sarcasm*

In an industry slowly suffocating to death via lack of software sales, AAA taking a nose dive and the indie darlings laying the smack down on industry staples, it's hard to take anything IGN says seriously these days. Sonic Mania looks to be a glorious return to form and they want to perpetuate a narrative that truly hasn't been relevant since Sonic Unleashed.

IGN: BUT SANIK BOOM!!!! THAT PROVES SANIK TEEM STILL SUCK!!!

Me: A game made by a different publisher and was rushed out for a TV show. Little to no Sonic Team involvement, your argument is invalid.


I look forward to IGN's review of Sonic Mania. Too see how much crow they'll be eating.
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NewtonDood's avatar
An enemy of Steve Shives is a friend of mine. Nice Summary