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This would have been a comic, but I said fuck it, here's an audio.

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455 - Never Forget November by RandomDC3
455 - Never Forget November
November was far too long. It felt like an eternity. I tried to extend a more broader knowledge with this edition of the Month Reviews but maintain my UK first news policy. I have excluded the Bill Cosby r*pe scandal because I ran out of time again, and with something like that I wanted more information and research done.

UKIP have no sense of humour.
www.theguardian.com/commentisf…

Politicians are humourless, and in other news the Bear shits in the woods!

I don't really have much to say about Nigel Farage. All politicians are the same to me, they all try the same bag of tricks to get elected. Farage trying to appear "down to earth/normal" is kinda like Megatron pretending he's all cute and cuddly.

I won't waste anymore time acknoledging UKIP. They'll fail like all the other "I'm one of you!" parties.


Park Life
www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dAFbp…
This is one of those difficult scenarios. I personally wouldn’t break if I saw Russell Brand crossing the street, yet I sadly feel he has a point on a few things. Things are pretty bad, the poor man is the rich man’s whipping boy, no jobs or hope and we're in another illegal war in Iraq. Yet at the same time, he does something I find quite irritating which far too many people abuse these days. He uses big words to try and sound smarter than he really is. You know that kind of smarmy intelligence that makes you want to punch the person in the face.... I guess that's why everyone hates The Riddler so much!

So you can see how the "Park Life" meme became to be.

It all began when the zombies on Twitter began retweeting (That is such a stupid term) Brand's comments under the hashtag "Park life!" in reference to the 1994 song by Blur. It was looked at by Brand's followers as a smear campaign to undermine what the man is saying, a sort of "This will shut him up!" kinda movement. While non Brand followers felt it perfectly summed up how deluded the man really is, for his "Diet Alex Jones" ramblings about revolutions and austerity was "a load of old bollocks!"

Personally I feel it's a little from a column A, a little from column B.

Like I said, I wouldn't piss on Brand if he was on fire! Yet I feel it's strange that when somebody points out "Hey things are getting worse!" we make fun of them or cast them out. Maybe we're content to live in our own collective ignorance?

Or people on Twitter are just complete morons!

However, rather than throw a wobbler over the joke. Russle's embraced it with his own parody, containing lyrics such as.

"Verbal dexterity plus estuary accent is what leads to parody of
PARKLIFE

But words used efficently can be a dangerous tool that slices through propaganda like a
SHARP KNIFE

We can’t get our heads around the fact that five families have as much dough as 12 million Brits, that can’t be right in any accent
CLASS STRIFE

You can’t be polysyllabic or talk about important things unless you went to school in a top hat and tails
ETON"


So, who won this then?

Twitter with another shitty hashtag? Or the man for playing along with the joke?

Well, when Theresa May gets her way and free speech is terminated.... We'll call it a draw!

A fitting tribute to Rik
www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/…

*a moment of silence*


Will somebody please put a bullet in Katie Hopkins head?
www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity…

This is why the East won't talk to us!

I have no kind words for this woman. At first, I felt she was a misguided snooty bitch; judging people souly on their name. I remember the episode I did of English Bstards on her (seriously who calls it a playdate?) and could tell this is an over privledged woman with a stick up her ass!! Now I begin to see her for what she really is.

A racist. A clueless, ignorant racist.

I have no ill will towards muslims and I don't give a shit about ISIS but even I found her comments unexceptable!! Inciting blatant racism should not be tollerated and this woman needs her head examined. Which is interesting that she's been given the platform to do it! If you or I made those remarks, we'd be fired on the spot! Also as I snarkingly mentioned Theresa May's plans for internet censorship makes me wonder how far that will extend?

So say that happens and I call out David Cameron, Amy Childs (seriously? EBOLA is a boyband?) or Emma Watson. Under May's ruling, I and other Internet commentators could serve prison time. Katie Hopkins compares Muslims to rats and nothing will happen probably. That is why I have no faith in the system, society or life for that matter. Clueless figures event rules to "protect us!" when what they're really doing is protecting the racist cunts from an honest critique from people like me!

Keep running your mouth Katie. because eventually, to paraphrase the Undertaker, it will soon be time to cash the cheques your mouths been writing!


We landed on a comKIM KARDASHIAN GOT HER ASS OUT AND THAT GUY HAS A SEXIST SHIRT ON!!?? CRUCIFY THE PATRIARCAL BASTARD!!!!
time.com/3581618/kim-kardashia…
www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5nLIS…

Why is this considered news? Kardashian that is, not the probe.

Kim Kardashian has an ass. Big deal! I have an ass, you have an ass, everyone has an ass!!! It's not exactly a revolutionary skill to have. Unless your ass can smash walls or play the piano! Not to mention this no talent hack is where she is souly because of a sex tape. Yet I don't seem to recall Alexis Texas or Leah Francis getting this much attention for having a large backside. I find it bloody typical! We make a breakthrough in the name of science, something that should be talked about for generations.... And it's brushed aside cus some aging bint with the IQ and talent of a dried up raisen got her bum out which was supposed to "break the internet"

No, when Fajita Sarkiseen runs her mouth or another Avengers trailer comes out. THAT breaks the internet! Not to mention how much porn is uploaded everyday. One quick image from Kim is more like "hardly making a dent on the Internet!" or, considering the person in question it should be "PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO ME EVERYONE!!!! IT'S ME KIM KARDASHIAN, PLEASE ATTENTION TO ME!!!!"

Now from a plastic arse, to a group of arseholes!

The subject and news of the Philae probe landing was overlooked by radical morons focusing on a shirt. Yes, you herd me right.... A shirt. Something that's got fuck all to do with this scientific breakthrough! Now, the last time I commented on a feminism subject, I was accused of being apart of the evil scheming Patriarchy. So, in a similair vain to the Toy Story 4 rant, I sought out the opinion of others on the matter. Got a little discussion going and took note (with permission) of some highlights of the conversation.

Here's what they had to say!

"For Shirtgate, during an interview with the project head, a 'feminist' got upset because he was wearing a racy shirt with women in suggestive poses (not naked). The shirt was a birthday gift from a friend (who was a woman) and feminist lost their shit because 'lol sexist objectification' People are losing their shit because 1. He apologized, and cried on camera and still got harassed, 2. It's fucking hypocritical that feminist cry about being harassed over what they wear then harass a man for wearing a shirt on the happiest day of his life. 3. It's just a fucking shirt and feminist lose their shit and go on about women in science for no god damn reason. Saying the shirt is the reason there aren't more women in the sciences"

"James, something to think about: feminists don't give a shit about Kim Kardashian showing off her arse on a magazine, but if you put those photos on your shirt you are sexist"

"People, mainly feminazis, blew this whole thing way out of proportion. Apparently to them, a shirt with women on it is objectification, yet a naked woman on a magazine cover is liberating. And I find it very hypocritical that women expect to not be treated differently for the clothes they are wearing, yet they will do the same to men."

"I can understand that the shirt is problematic because it uses women as a decorative element, but it obviously holds personal significance to him. Plus it was designed by a woman. It was a gift, he didn't go out and purchase it. So people need to chill the fuck out"

 "I think Feminazis went too far, plain & simple. I've seen men wearing shirts with scantly-clad women before & they never lost their minds then. They're probably also running out of ideas to try & make their bid to "take over the world".

"This is why I call third wave feminism "femi-theism".The fact is, the sex-positive femi-theists are just as bad as the sex-negative femi-theists or I would dare say "worse". While we have a sex negative like Anita saying that a woman wearing scantaly clad clothing is a result of the patriarchy and it contributes to the male gaze (I in fact just say it's because women can dress however the fuck they want and I have no say on the matter), a sex positive femi-theist is a wolf in sheeps clothing."

"ShirtGate? Is that what they are calling that thing where scientists did the nigh impossible (landing a probe on a moving comet), and instead of reveling in the scientific awesomeness, feminists raged over the inoffensive shirt worn by one of the scientists. Oh, how awful. He had women on his shirt, and all of those women are clothed. How dare he wear a shirt that has artwork on it. Seriously, all third wave feminists need to fuck off right now.

They are doing far more damage to the feminist cause then they can even imagine. In their crusade to destroy gender equality, they are making their gender look whiny, insecure, and shallow. Think about that last one for a moment. Shallow. We witnessed an historic scientific achievement, and all they can talk about is what the scientists were wearing when they accomplished said achievement. If Joan Rivers were still alive, she would tell this women to shut up and show some respect for the milestone we reached.

Mind you, Joan Rivers was such a paragon of shallowness that she had a show on E! that did nothing but harp on what people were wearing. She was shallow for a living, and these feminists are making her look as deep as the Grand fucking Canyon. Every person who has made a big deal out of ShirtGate should be ashamed of themselves and pull their heads out of their asses. Their actions are nothing shy of shameful."

So to recab.

Kim Kardashian titillating the internet with her plastic ass = empowering to the feminist cause.
A no name scientist wearing a shirt, designed and gifted by a woman, working with a female team of scientists = Patriarchy!!!

God bless ThirdWave, your continued stupidity keeps me laughing all into the night. I suppose when we finally find a cure for AIDS, EBOLA or other life threatning diseases. I'm sure feminism will dismiss it entirely.

I don't know, the scientist probably wore a pair of shoes that upsets them.


Old man feeds homeless? SEND HIM TO PRISON!!!!
www.independent.co.uk/news/wor…

Quoting the linked article directly.
"A 90-year-old man is facing up to 60 days in jail for feeding the needy due to a new law that bans people in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, from meal-sharing with the public."

.... I'm sorry what? Compassion and kindness can land you jail time now?

90 year old Arnold Abbott is arrested for feeding the homeless. I still don't see how that is a crime in all honesty.

The part that baffles me the most about this is the story is from America. You know, that country with Christian values at heart. In that feeding the homeless or compassion is some of those values? Utterly disgusted by this news. Here is a man willing to give his time, money and energy into looking after those less fortunate than you or I. Yet he's going to prison, along with a $500 fine. Bastards, heartless bastards the lot of you!

When asked about it, Arnold had this to say.

Quote.
"One of police officers came over and said ‘Drop that plate right now,’ as if I was carrying a weapon. These are the poorest of the poor, they have nothing, they don't have a roof over their heads. How do you turn them away?"
End Quote.

I guess the only answer I can offer you Arnold is America doesn't care about them. Yet it wants to proclaim it's "the greatest country in the world!"

He has vowed to keep feeding the homeless and good on him for doing that. At least some people out there still have some common fucking sense!

Naruto ended
And nothing of value was lost!

"Black Friday, Black Friday. Gotta get savage on Black Friday!"
D'you want to know why I dislike this time of year (November - December) so much? Well, it's mainly due to greed and claustrophobia. What I mean is everywhere feels like a closed impact space, unable to breathe or move about freely. Streets are packed, shops are clogged in and roads are jammed. All because far too many people have bought into the myth of "the festive season" which used to mean "peace and love" but now means "Spend every single penny you have on crap you'll never need" to the point you want to just barricade yourself in and avoid everything till January 1st... In fact that's exactly what I've done in recent years.

Now, what does all that have to do with Black Friday?

Consider if you will I am a small time country boy, living in the middle of nowhere. If my experiences with this are akin to a water balloon, than Americans dealing with Black Friday is like a fucking tidal wave the size of Vince McMahon's ego!

Watching footage of people charging into a store like Wal-Mart by literally smashing down a security gate brings to mind images of a Zombie movie like the Dawn of the Dead remake of 2004. People beating the piss out of each other over a Laptop, a TV or an Xbox One does make me feel we've failed as a species. In that we'll resort to savagery if it means we're guarantied a good deal on something.

Out of blatant curiosity, I did a Wikipedia search for Black Friday and found something interesting. In the "related to" section, Christmas and Boxing Day are mentioned. What I take away from that is Black Friday's another way to artificially lengthening Christmas by another 2 sodding weeks! I may not exactly be the best when it comes to religion but I do understand one basic thing about Christmas.

If you want to look beyond the conceptual idea of the birth of Jesus Christ, Christmas embodies the idea of "Peace on Earth and Goodwill to all Mankind!" (No I won't change that quote to appease feminists for that is the quote) yet I feel that's sadly been lost in translation as time goes by. Christmas should be that one day every year we put aside everything and tolerate each other for a meal and seven hours! Why we can't do that the other three hundred and sixty four days of the year is beyond me. Yet now that means the best way to achieve this is to BUY SOMETHING!

No, just no. You've missed the point of the holiday and you should be ashamed of yourselves. You've mistaken greed for true love and happiness, the very thing this holiday was originally about. It's why I avoid everything till January 1st to get away from you consumer zombies. Go and buy a toaster alarm clock you'll never need or a snuggy for your clueless girlfriend.

I'll be in my Hermit Cave until it's all over... Watching The Grinch steal all your shit!

Sonic Bombed.
..... No I haven't played Sonic Boom and have no intention either. Mainly the following reasons.

1: I don't own a Wii U.
2: Works been tough lately. I mentioned previously my main comic work is done on weekends now because of it.
3: I have HDG-R, Sprites, Comics, Rants and other work to do on weekends.
4: My friend Kariookami has gifted me Kid Icarus Uprising (since you all DEMANDED I play it) so I want to finish that first.
5: Then Pokemon Omega Ruby comes next. I mainly owe it that much cus Ruby was the game that got me back into Pokemon in my college years.

So while I have nothing to say, here's NightmareOzLuff with an opinion on it.
"Sonic Boom : Rise of Lyric came out this month , it’s to be honest one of the most shocking Sonic games in recent years , not because it’s amazing , it’s the opposite actually , it’s the worst executed Sonic game since Sonic 06. I can’t believe how bad the game truly turned out, I was hoping it would have been good since Sonic NEEDED a change , can't do the same thing forever like a certain plumber and no I have no problems with the character designs myself , I actually like them.

The story is honestly a bore, Eggman is reduced to a punching bag only appearing for about 10 minutes of the story , I mean seriously Eggman is in the intro to the game , then two fights in the middle launching missles at you while your on a boat (cue annoying song) then appearing in a giant mech at the end and defeated rather easily. Why is Eggman not the focus you may ask ?

The game is focused on Megatron Kaa , uhhh I mean Lyric who gets re-awakened by Sonic and his friends , being a idiot as usual entering where he dosen’t belong , hell Amy warns him not to go inside , but oh no Metal Sonic and 20 enemies are slowly , very slowly walking towards them , better go inside an old temple that might be filled with booby traps. Hell even Shadow is in this game , uhhh why , he is only in it for a pointless boss fight then pops in at the ending to moan and complain. This is one of the worst stories I have seen in a Sonic game. And oh yeah Sonic time travel 1000 years in the past to only give Lyric a reason to hate him , he locks him in a room , I wish I wasnt kidding.

The gameplay is bland , very bland. Take the gameplay of Ratchet and Clank , Crash Bandicoot , Banjo Kazooie and Epic Mickey, blend them in a defective blender and voilà you have the gameplay of Sonic Boom. You might have speed sections here and there trying to emulate the Sonic games , but thanks to the 15-20 frames per second the game runs on , most of the time you will see the game running very slowly making it impossible sometimes to control your characters . The game is also very glitchy , yes its 06 bad , you can do it all , you can jump off to your doom outside the game , you can trigger endless jumping and even the magical ability of clipping through the walls , going in and out as you please. One more thing about the gameplay , while I love the voice acting in this game , the chatter in the levels is truly annoying , they just won’t shut the fuck up, yes it’s worse than in Kid Icarus Uprising.

So in my opinion , skip Sonic Boom : Rise of Lyric and buy the Sonic Boom comic from Archie instead , hell watch the cartoon on Cartoon Network , it ‘s ACTUALLY good !!!"


Ouch.... That was pretty harsh (remember his words, NOT mine)


..... Well, I like the cartoon at least.


Putting a BAND-AID over the Ebola.

- I am well aware Bono recently had an accident. However since he isn't the focal point of this rant I have decided to keep it in, I wish him a speedy recovery-

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/world…
www.independent.co.uk/arts-ent…
studyreadwrite.wordpress.com/2…
motleymusings.com/tag/band-aid…

Where, do I even begin with this?

Oh I know, setting this up so you have a little bit of context.

1) I actively work 4 days a week for a local charity. I'm not paid to do this but I choose to be there cus I want to help in any way I can. I also had a minor accident recently (Nothing serious mind you) but I'm still at work. Over 28 hours a week is more effort in the name of charity than an afternoon in a recording studio, regurgitating an outdated song from 1984.

2) I also donate to cancer and diabetes research, as well as Guide Dogs for the blind. Just because I choose not to follow these "spur of the moment" movements, fads or songs doesn't make me uncaring or selfish. But I'm already giving time and money to causes I believe in. Adding in that I work for a charity 4 days a week with that means I'm already doing more than enough for "my part!"

3) I've always hated this song. While I admit it served a purpose back in 1984. Yet it's not 1984 anymore and the song is now a shell of it's former self. Once was sung by recognisable faces is now churned out by forgettable nobodies from X Factor, tax dodging millionaires or aging dickheads (Bono) with a Messiah complex.


I don't think celebrities get charities. They also seem to think we're all idiots who need to be informed by them that "bad shit is happening!"
Understandable 30 years ago. Many people were not informed and relied on this and other mediums for news and information. Yet 30 years on in the age of Broadband, Social Media, Twitter, Youtube and other online information providers; the question needs to be asked.

Nevermind if they know it's Christmas, but do we need this song anymore?
(Also considering the large number of Christians in Africa, YES they know it's Christmas!)

Personally I don't think we do. I've said this about the Ice Bucket Challenge and I'll say it about Band-Aid. Charity is about you wanting to help others less fortunate than you. "If you're climbing a mountain bring a rope" basically. Charity is NOT doing something to make YOU "feel good" about yourself. I view these people making it all about themselves and how "good" they are. "I did this for charity, aren't I a super-di-dooper person?" and other horseshit that makes me want to clout them with a sledgehammer.

You know, for missing the point.

Again, going back to my example with what I do. I don't do it cus I'm special, important or want to pat myself on the back. I do it cus I want to! I want to help and that's what I'm doing. Yet the message has always remained the same with Geldof's little song.

"GIVE US YOUR MONEY!!!!!"

Well, pardon me your holiness. If it's that important to you, why not give your money? It comes off as utterly patronising for pompous tax dodging millionaires telling the Plebs to give money in a time of a recession. Meaning we have little money to begin with! Well at least Adele just straight up gave her money to Oxfam; and I don't even like Adele but hey, gotta give respect when it's earned and she earned a bit of mine for that gesture. Unlike "The Feel good through patronising brigade" who wants to guilt trip you with fear and sadness. Sorry, but your little guilt trip didn't work in 2004 and time isn't making you stronger.

It's also a curious thing. I voiced opinions like these back in 2004 about Band-Aid 20. I was told the basic message about how "it's all for a good cause!" or "Don't be so cynical about this!" among other things.

Yet 10 years on. Everyone is more cynical about the song than I am! Here are a few quotes I found (mainly to prove I do actual research on these Month Reviews)

"But however well-intentioned, this isn't something you'll care to listen to again and again. It's not even something you'd care to hear at a Christmas party in 2014. We're not opposed to a charity record - there are ways of musicians to get involved in fundraising where the music is wonderful. We just won't be bullied into buying a mediocre record when there are plenty of other ways to donate and your bit to help."
Digital Spy.

"Give us your f***ing money," was Geldof’s message way back when, and it is his message now – you all dig deep and give up your hard earned cash because these famous people who make millions singing songs have deigned to give up a few hours of their time on a weekend. I don’t want to be implored to give charitably by a band that travels in separate private jets because they don’t get on (One Direction), or by a man who avoids Irish taxes while simultaneously telling the Irish government to help developing countries (Bono)."
Bryony Gordon of The Guardian.

"There are problems with our idea of charity, especially these things that suddenly balloon out of nothing and then create a media frenzy where some of that essential communication is lost...and it starts to feel like it's a process where if you give money you solve the problem, and really sometimes giving money creates another problem."
Damon Albarn.

Finally I want to comment on the first thing you see in the video. The footage of Ebola victims, designed to guilt trip you into buying this ghastly song. That is a scumbag move to exploit victims and the dead in a manner such as this. I view it as Geldof going "LOOK!!! LOOK AT THIS!!! YOU HAD NO IDEA OF THIS YOU HEARTLESS PLEBS!!! NOW SELL YOUR HOUSE AND GIVE US ALL YOUR MONEY!!!!"

Sorry Bob, we're more informed than you these days. Your little song is a relic from a former age that is no longer required. It had a point once, but the redos, revamps and collection of new faces that won't be remembered 30 years from now ain't going to cut it anymore. The original (as awful as it is) was fine the way it was, but like Sonic the Hedgehog and his countless updates and modifications, you couldn't leave it the fuck alone and now even less cynical people than I don't like your song.

What a scary world we live in.


The difficult subject of Ferguson.
Out of all the subjects of this Month Review. THIS is the one I've decided to tread VERY carefully with. In a manner of walking on a million eggshells with Landmines in them.

I did briefly mention or allude to Ferguson in a previous Month Review, I didn't go fully into it because I wasn't sure how to. Now with the verdict being passed down and rioting taking place (probably as you read this) I'm now really unsure how to approach this.

To quote Al Murray "I'll ave a punt why not!?"

The basic understanding I've learned (again, not up to date on American news these days) is the outrage began on August 9th with the fatal shooting of Michael Brown, an 18 year old teen at the hands of 28 year old Darren Wilson.

While some would argue Brown did commit a crime (Assaulting a clerk and stole $48 worth of cigarillos if my sources are correct) there is NO cause or reason to shoot someone that many times! Regardless of the crime, a young man has been murdered. Dress it up all you want but a human life was taken at the hands of another. I'd also go further to say that a Police officer does not need that kind of weaponry to handle a situation. Oddly, I am reminded of the London Riots of 2011. Plus looking deeply into it there are some very striking similarities.

Michael Brown was shot dead on August 9th.
Mark Duggan was shot dead on August 4th.

Both were shot dead by Police using excessive force.
Both began with protest marches which escalated into violence.

Both spread to other areas beyond their origin.
From Ferguson, it went to New York.
From Tottenham, it went to London.

Both involve tension and distain for the Police.
Both devolved into anger, looting and violence.

When asked about the looting and violence, a member of Michael's family stated that "The stealing and breaking in stores is not what Mike will want, it is very upsetting to me and my family. Our family didn't ask for this but for justice and peace"

I couldn't agree more with this statement. Violence is never the answer to violence. I do realise American police brutality is more extreme than it is where I'm from but the treatment of it's citizens, ranging from violence, racism and aggression is horrendous. My deepest sympathy and wishes go out to Michael's family who have been delt a tragic loss and a completely unexceptable verdict. A verdict which would be unexceptable for anyone regardless of race or gender.

While I really shouldn't be commentating on this, I was asked for an opinion so an opinion I shall give. The police are using unessacary force and should be held responsible if a human life is taken. It is disgusting that this is allowed to continue but I also feel the looting and burning of buildings are completely uncalled for.

Just like they were in 2011.
Loading...

This would have been a comic, but I said fuck it, here's an audio.
454 - Operation Retcon Part 2 by RandomDC3
454 - Operation Retcon Part 2
"I'll let you know in due time if this was kickass, or if Captain America 2 is still my fav movie of 2014."

So.... Operation Retcon Part 1 was put up on the 26th of May. It's now the 23rd of November.

"What took me so long?" you may ask?

Well. It's a number of things.

1 - I usually like to watch movies with my brother MJKnight, and at the time he didn't think "it looked any good."

2 - Both of us couldn't get time off of work, a bit tricky when reviewing movies. By the time we had free schedules the movie wasn't playing anymore.

3 - I had just entered my S.H.M.B. (Super Hero Movie Burnout) phase, which you can blame ASM2 on.

4 - My new job has left me running ragged lately. I just finally had time to watch the DVD version MJ brought home. Yes I could have done this when it came out but I was fucking shagged out (limey way of saying tired) from the job.

5 - Previous reasoning I gave in regards to Smash Bros HDG-R being delayed.

6 - And most importantly... I was broke.


Reasoning and excuses aside. Is Cap2 still my fav movie or did this beat it?

....... No, its close but I like Cap more.


Now, I am fully aware that the movie is based on the much beloved X-Men storyline of the same name and completely ignores most of it. I haven't read it personally but what I gathered is Kitty Pryde goes into the past to stop Senator Kelly from being assassinated by Mystique and her mutants. Fox said "Fuck Kitty Pryde!" and made the movie all about cash cow Wolverine!

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay *rolls eyes*

Don't get me wrong, I think Hugh Jackman is a great actor but I'm just tired of nearly EVERY X-Men movie being about him. Thankfully, this movie isn't completely about Logan but more of a triangle between Professor X, Magneto and Mystique... Played by Jennifer Lawrence.

Okaaaaaay, gonna get this out of the way now, but I cannot stand Jennifer Lawrence. Like Scarlet "Robocop" Johanson I think she cannot act for shit and delivers all her lines with the same enthusiasm as a disgruntled cyborg. "And. I. Will. Kill. Them. Too!" Jesus, I've seen Hayden Christensen act better than this; and he's the guy who "ruined" Darth Vader (according to the Internet whereas I blame George Lucas for his shitty writing and directing) and that's saying something! Every time she was on screen I found myself saying "could you at least try!?" yes I know its awkward cus you're practically naked and all (something she's probably used to by now) but can you try and act?

Now that I've pissed off Hunger Games fans, let's deal with my only other nitpicks. Starting with the Sentinels.

No, not their designs (even if they look like a cross between Ultron, Slender Man and The Destroyer) but rather their lack of contribution. One aspect I was looking forward to in an X-Men movie was the team battling Sentinels like in the 90's cartoon. I got a small glimpse of it in X3 but now I thought this would be the time to see some good old Mutant Vs. Robot action.

While I did get that and I liked what I saw, I just have minor nitpicks with it. Mainly the fighting was pretty brief and was against characters I had no idea who in pancake flipping fuck are. I mean I recognise Bishop and all, but "PortalGirl" "Razorfist" and "The Human Torch" didn't ring a bell with me. Again, I openly admit I've never read the comic it's based on so consider that ignorance on my part and feel free to fill me in. The Sentinels of the 1970's don't look as bad as people made them out to be; and looked perfectly fine in motion. I just wished they did more and spoke.  I'm not entirely sure if Sentinels had the power to copy Mutant abilities and use them in a rock paper scissors manner. I'm also not convinced Kitty Pryde can send people back in time. I thought she just walked through walls.

I guess the idea of a comic book movie set in the future just going "Oh hey, we have a TIME MACHINE!!!" would be considerd "ridiculous" but whatevs, let's have Kitty deus ex machina Wolverine to the past to save the future from creepypasta versions of Mega Man!

Lastly, the consequence of death.

When a character dies in a story, it should leave an impact on the viewer or trigger some form of emotional response. In the beginning Sentinels brutally murder some D listers and Kitty pulls some deus ex machina to undo it. Which leads to the movies conclusion of "No it's okay; we just fixed it so no problem!" It's what got on my tits about Dragonball Z, when they just get the wish granting dragon to undo everything. So why bother showing me Storm or Portal Girl being butchered in dramatic slow-motion, if you'll just undo it 10 minutes from now? Death should have a form of consequence (yeah I know, comic book plot) but it does reduce the tension or suspense knowing they'll just bring people back to life as easily as switching on a kitchen light!

Shame the same can't be said for Emma Frost and the others from First Class. Seeing them cast off and killed without proper explanation really pissed me off. Not as much as Ratchet's death in Transformers 4 but it's close!

I'm not saying I hate this movie, and do take those as nitpicks. Its little things like that which annoys me about movies like this and the comics they're based on. Having said I really enjoyed the movie.

The continued story of Charles and Eric being my favourite part. First Class really built up a friendship between the two in a way that felt genuine. This movie is that part where two former friends try to be BFF again.... But it fails because you forget Magneto is a massive twat! What I liked about James McAvoy is how he humanised Charles Xavier, and made him a real person instead of a wise old mentor who spoke in riddles. Michael Fassbender is perfect as Magneto! While I still enjoy the talents of Ian McKellen, this Magneto is ruthless and very sinister! Something I look for in a movie villain. Even Peter Dinklage was a show stealer! I don't care that he was apparently "too small" this guy nailed that part! Just goes to show you always hire people for their talent, not their appearence.

*coughjenniferlawrence*

The scene where both Xavier's met had to happen, even though Doc Brown would have kittens over that scenario! It felt like it was a conversation you wanted to see and I guess in a weird way, a conversation we all want to have. In that if you could help your younger self when they're struggling you probably would. Visually the movie is stunning to look at, except the scenes in the future which look like a generic Playstation 2 game. The mutant abilities look fine and the secondary cast is okay.

The whole purpose of the movie was to basically erase X3 and X-Men Origins: Wolverine from the timeline. While I will commend them for not just going "urgh, let's just reboot it!" and actually doing it the hard way, I am saddened that the movies I enjoyed (X1 & 2) are no longer cannon and have been ret conned. Sure it means maybe Deadpool and Dark Phoenix get another chance but it sucks that, well you know.

Finally... Quicksilver.

..... I feel so sorry for Aaron Taylor-Johnson.

Oh wait, no I don't!

I won't go into this too much but it's something you need to see for yourself (and considering how late I've been with this you probably already have) but this made me ignore Age of Ultron's Quicksilver. It was perfect, brief and didn't over stay its welcome. Cus I have a feeling if he was in the movie longer he'd of gotten annoying very quickly.


So yeah, I enjoyed Days of Future Past and I'll be sure to check out the next instalment in 2016.

.... And knowing how long it took me to review this one, expect my X-Men Apocalypse Review in 2020.
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:iconevangelian007:
evangelian007 Featured By Owner 2 days ago
Hey DCE!
Did you know that James Gunn is showing concern of the over exposure of the whole Cinematic Universe shtick?

And in a strange way he's pretty correct. I mean Universal tried to do that with Dracula(which had a bad reception from what I heard), Warner Bros and DC Comics are now gonna do that with the upcoming Batman/Superman film(which we don't know if it will be good or not), Sony tried to do that with Amazing Spiderman 2(even though I enjoyed it I'll admit that that decision did more harm than good), Disney and Lucasfilm are now planing to make a Cinematic Universe around Star Wars and Marvel is already planning a f***ton of new films for their Marvel film universe. 

Now even though I don't agree with Confused Mathew he was strangely right when he said that the Marvel Cinematic Universe was doing more harm to the film industry than good.

I have to give it to Gunn for having the guts to actually showing concern over the whole Cinematic Universe Business practice. Maybe he was also doing a passive aggressive stab at Marvel Studios too. Who knows. 
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:iconperrythehedgehog:
perrythehedgehog Featured By Owner 5 days ago
You know, I've noticed something about you.

...You whinge too fucking much.
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:iconwhitewillow13:
WhiteWillow13 Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Hobbyist Artist
Thanks for the fave on my picture. :D 
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:iconrandomdc3:
RandomDC3 Featured By Owner 5 days ago
No prob.
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:iconcommanderzaktan:
CommanderZaktan Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2014
Tomorrow is the release of Smash Bros for Wii U in the UK.  Are you getting it for Christmas?
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:iconrandomdc3:
RandomDC3 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2014
*looks at the spot where a Wii U should be in my house*
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:iconcommanderzaktan:
CommanderZaktan Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2014
So I guess you have a Wii U after all? If so, wanna be friends for online matches?
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:iconrandomdc3:
RandomDC3 Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2014
Read it again.
*looks at the spot where a Wii U SHOULD BE in my house*

As in "should be there cus I don't have one.
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(1 Reply)
:iconbazukatree:
BazukaTREE Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2014
Thank you for watching! :D
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:iconsingory:
singory Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2014
Thanks for the :+fav: :)
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